NPeter's Story

For those reading this blog, your initial question must be, "Who is NPeter?" If not, it's probably something like, "Would MacGyver have unprotected sex?" I think we all know the answer to the latter, so let me expose the former's proper answer.

NPeter is the craziest of pit bosses at Foxwoods Casino in Connecticut. And by crazy, I mean "Calculating, calm, and armed with a rapist's wit."

We met NPeter when our friend Greg saddled up at a Blackjack table in NPeter's jurisdiction. Apologies to those who know NPeter, for the entire planet is his jurisdiction. But for the story's sake, I feel we need to understate NPeter's iron fist.

Jordan, Andy, Ian and I watched Greg from a distance for 20 minutes, hoping not to upset any momentum he had. Upon the Blackjack dealer spotting us and pointing, apparently we creeped her out by wearing sunglasses and giggling at her patrons, we moved in closer to Greg to offer support.

This is when our paths crossed with NPeter. Like the collision of two rivers, one black water, the other white water, our synergy instantly overcame any societal notions of decorum or restraint in a public place.

The mood intensified, as if we all knew we caught lightning in a bottle and we wanted to do our best Motley Crue impersonation; indulge face first and get as high as possible for as long as possible.

Ian was the first to strike, he asked NPeter, "Why does your name tag say NPeter?"

NPeter replied, "Yeah. Foxwoods really knows how to spell, don't they?"

Initiate launch sequence.

The next 20 minutes of NPeter's life consisted of a verbal assault of poetry, scathing indictments of his name tag and some fairly creative puns.

"Greg...get and NNNNNNNNNblackjack."

"Come on dealer...give him an NNNNNNNNNNace."

"Hey NNNNNNPeter...why don't you NNNNNNNNcomp Greg a room. "

Needless to say, every gambler within earshot took notice, most joining in the revelry and insidious comedy.

BUT, all the while, NPeter kept his cool. He gracefully walked away from Greg's table once he weathered our NNNNNslings and arrows.

And for that, we love him.

For that, we respect him.

For that, we live for him.

For that, we blog for him.